El dogma de lo pueril

La vida exige escoger. Incluso no escoger es una elección. No, nunca es fácil, nunca estamos seguros de cuál es la opción correcta. Pero llega un momento en el que estás obligado a enfrentarte a tus pulsiones, probablemente, a las crudas, a las más difíciles de digerir.


Desde su más tierna infancia se entregó al hado de la imaginación. Esa portentosa maquinaria, el artefacto de primer orden para fabricar sueños. La vía de escape perfecta del desteñido y opaco día, de la rutina que barnizamos con una abundante capa de “éxito”. Pero su uso extremo empaña la vista y retuerce la percepción. Son daños profusos en el alma. En el subconsciente, el “otro yo”, territorio sombrío o que irradia candidez, se incuba un delirio extremo, un peligroso dogma de predestinación a la gloria, que ruge, rasguñe y enferma.

En consecuencia a esta certeza, confirió a lo real un trasfondo de dualidad y rezó su propio credo. Imaginó a su alrededor señales, signos inequívocos de que iba por el buen camino. ¿Mencioné que las ilusiones desembocan en distorsión? Y así ocurrió. Se autoproclamó rey de un vasto imperio imaginario, donde sus súbditos admiraban su sobrada magnificencia. Presumiblemente, extrapoló estas imaginaciones a su cotidianeidad, exhibiendo un autoconcepto elitista, totalmente errado.

Este estrafalario comportamiento lo aisló, negándose a compartir su espacio vital, a relacionarse con sus congéneres. A priori no le importó. Se convenció a sí mismo de que se había alejado voluntariamente de un gueto que tachaba de mediocre, aburrido y carente de metas. No obstante, una noche cualquiera, a saber en qué año, se sentó en el alféizar de la ventana de su maltrecho cuartucho de piso alquilado en la periferia de la capital, y dirigió la vista hacia las columnas de luz que besaban el firmamento. Sus colores chispeantes y vivos activaron el mecanismo de su maquinaria de sueños. Eran luces de ciudad, cientos, miles o quizás un millón de interruptores encendidos simultáneamente. Intentó imaginar -su jactante capacidad- qué estarían haciendo sus lejanos vecinos.

Curiosamente, y por primera vez, se sintió solo, irreal. Palpó sus brazos y piernas. Eran carne, sangre, nervios, hueso y de nuevo carne. Rememoró la última vez que estuvo con una mujer. Sus labios, depósito de una inquieta lengua, sus blancos senos y su risa estridente. No podía evocarla de otra forma, es más, no era capaz de recordar su cara, pero la echó de menos. Súbita e incomprensiblemente, aceptó que no se puede vivir de sueños, que ninguno de ellos sería viable. Se reprochó su falta de practicidad. Envidió por primera vez lo normal y pueril, lo que siempre adjetivó como mediocre. Volvió a mirar aquellas luces en un intento de ignorar este nuevo sentimiento: la soledad de un simple destino. Un destino que presume ser diferente para esos ciudadanos de clase media, con vidas hipotecadas, asalariados que defienden con una sonrisa que la felicidad sólo es posible mientras puedan comprar.

Consternado, muy consternado, estuvo dándole vueltas al asunto toda la noche. “¿Cuál es la respuesta correcta?, “¿Soy real?”, “¿Qué es real?”, se preguntó tantas veces como tantas luces se apagaron. Cuando la tierra volvió a nacer y sus cálidos rayos acariciaron sus mejillas, se dejó vencer por el sueño, cayéndose por la ventana de su mísera vivienda situada en un quinto piso. Despertar es evidente que despertó. Quizás si hubiera nacido en otro lugar, en otra época y en otro cuerpo, podría haber cumplido alguno de sus sueños. O no, quién sabe. Queridos lectores, este es el dogma de lo pueril y pocos escapan a sus banales principios. Maldita sea, ¿en qué mundo crees que vives?

Fdo. La abuela absurda.

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12 years ago

108 Comments

  1. pues si…que verdad, es la realidad de tantos y tantos que se esconden de sus sueños, tras esas ventanas que se apagan, como sus vidas..
    es un relato con moraleja….la abuela es sabia..si señor!!
    un beso..me ha gustado mucho..

  2. Hola Nieves,

    muchas gracias por tu comentario, haré llegar a la “abuela absurda” tus palabras, jajaja.

    Por cierto, acabo de comprobar que ambas estamos en “La Gaceta de Medianoche”, espero, en breve, estrenarme en la página.

    Un besito enorme y pronto nos veremos ^^

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